Now I know...

all of you , who have been reading my Life as it Is Blog, know our current situation. www.diana78.blogspot.com
Now I know why people always complain about covernment jobs/facilities etc. Fuck- LA passport services sucks, passport general info sucks, USPS sucks and workers there suck because systems they operate suck.
I Am sooo hireing a lawer if I do not get MY promised passport tomorrow morning. Does paying for overnight express delivery means that it reallly takes 4 overnights to deliver one fucking important document??? AND why isn't her package in USPS system for tracking???? Someone needs some serious spanking!!!!!!!

Oh my dear Estonian people- wait another 10 hours before I can give you YES or NO. I feel embarrased that I got everybodys hopes up and I feel sad if we do not get to go to EST this year. I know my mom is very exited about us going. And I hate to make her sad. And Regina and Gabriel started crying when i told them that we may not go tomorrow. Kids are so aware what is going on in here. They hear me talking on the phone they see me crying and they know - OH NO, REGINAS PASSPORT IS Not IN LAGUNA NIGUEL YET! lol I hate , hate, hate, hate letting everyone down, and it is not even my fault. Oh, WTF. It is 10.10 pm and I have not had anything to eat today. I tryed to eat apple, but after 2 bites I just threw up( yeah, that is how "exited" I am about things not going the way they supposed to go.

Good Night, Good Morning and Happy holidays. I need hugs and lots of them.

My day...

Today was totally MY day. lol It did not start out as MY day but it ended. Today I had guy in the house who had to prime my ceiling and walls. Last week i had constuction guys in my house because my ceiling had huge long cracks and some of my walls looked just stupid. So I just called to s&S construciton and they fixed it. SO today the was the day my walls got primed . AND tomorrow is another big day. My diningroom window has moisture seal block and moisture has sneaked in between 2 windows. TOmorrow my window will be replaced. UGH. Long day with people I do not know..

Well, anyway. I got 2 awsome packages from Estonia today. One from my Mom and one from my friend. My mom sent me 4 packs of my favorite coffee in whole wide world ( Presidentti Caffee) it is a Finnish coffee and it is my absolute favorite. That just made my day.

Then another package arrived. And when I opened it it just blew me away. The other day I was thinking emailing to my friend and telling her that I miss her teas. ( she picks and tries tealeaves, herbs, special berries etc, immune system boosters ). And when I opened the box , it had 3 different kinds of teas in ( OH I am in heaven), chocolate and cookies for kids( Estonian ones. My Christmas spirit is back. I am so fuckin' happy today. Seriously. I can not stop smiling. I have not had sex for loooooooong time, and if people see me like this , they will definitely think I had some recently..... lol

Oh, something did go wrong today.... I forgot to apply sunscrean today. I am using some meds and creams to clear my acme and because of that I can not expose my skin to sun. Today I went out to pick Regina from school and I totally forgot. Now my face hurts and burns, and I only was on sun about 8-10 minutes. Hope my skin does not peel off tomorrow.

What a good day...

Today was totally MY day. lol It did not start out as MY day but it ended. Today I had guy in the house who had to prime my ceiling and walls. Last week i had constuction guys in my house because my ceiling had huge long cracks and some of my walls looked just stupid. So I just called to s&S construciton and they fixed it. SO today the was the day my walls got primed . AND tomorrow is another big day. My diningroom window has moisture seal block and moisture has sneaked in between 2 windows. TOmorrow my window will be replaced. UGH. Long day with people I do not know..

Well, anyway. I got 2 awsome packages from Estonia today. One from my Mom and one from my friend. My mom sent me 4 packs of my favorite coffee in whole wide world ( Presidentti Caffee) it is a Finnish coffee and it is my absolute favorite. That just made my day.

Then another package arrived. And when I opened it it just blew me away. The other day I was thinking emailing to my friend and telling her that I miss her teas. ( she picks and tries tealeaves, herbs, special berries etc, immune system boosters ). And when I opened the box , it had 3 different kinds of teas in ( OH I am in heaven), chocolate and cookies for kids( Estonian ones. My Christmas spirit is back. I am so fuckin' happy today. Seriously. I can not stop smiling. I have not had sex for loooooooong time, and if people see me like this , they will definitely think I had some recently..... lol

Oh, something did go wrong today.... I forgot to apply sunscrean today. I am using some meds and creams to clear my acme and because of that I can not expose my skin to sun. Today I went out to pick Regina from school and I totally forgot. Now my face hurts and burns, and I only was on sun about 8-10 minutes. Hope my skin does not peel off tomorrow.

The end of the world is close by.... I am wearing white.. Not sure what happened, but other day I went to Mervins. And there it was- hanging between black and gray jackets- White beautiful midlengt jacket. Price tag 50%off original price. I tryed it on and it fit and it looked good,and people walking by commented how nice I looked on this white jacket.....lol I just had to have it... and then, I went home and found my sisters knitted scarf. Wrapped it around my short neck around my head and voilaa.... I look like something else......

Madonna..

.. I just have to talk about her today. I LUV, LUV, LUV her. She is so fucking awsome. Yeah, Yeah, Yeah, I allready see your faces, and hear your comments- but I DO NOT CARE!! I love her. She has been my favorite since I remember. I always admired her. i am not much into that kaballah or chaballah or whatever ballah thing, but I am totally INTO her. TOTALLY. If I was gay, I would stalk her until my face was on front page of PEOPLE magazine. lol. But since I am almost happily married, I just drool in fron of Tv and secretly try to act like her. Oh, BTW, my brettish accent is much better than hers. lol

And she is such an awsome shape.... OH, I want her to be my trainer....

*******
Time goes by so slowly
Time goes by so slowly
Time goes by so slowly
Time goes by so slowly
Time goes by so slowly
Time goes by so slowly

Every little thing that you say or do
I'm hung up
I'm hung up on you
Waiting for your call
Baby night and day
I'm fed up
I'm tired of waiting on you

Time goes by so slowly for those who wait
No time to hesitate
Those who run seem to have all the fun
I'm caught up
I don't know what to do

Time goes by so slowly
Time goes by so slowly
Time goes by so slowly
I don't know what to do

Every little thing that you say or do
I'm hung up
I'm hung up on you
Waiting for your call
Baby night and day
I'm fed up
I'm tired of waiting on you

Every little thing that you say or do
I'm hung up
I'm hung up on you
Waiting for your call
Baby night and day
I'm fed up
I'm tired of waiting on you

Ring ring ring goes the telephone
The lights are on but there's no-one home
Tick tick tock it's a quarter to two
And I'm done
I'm hanging up on you

I can't keep on waiting for you
I know that you're still hesitating
Don't cry for me
'cause I'll find my way
you'll wake up one day
but it'll be too late

Every little thing that you say or do
I'm hung up
I'm hung up on you
Waiting for your call
Baby night and day
I'm fed up
I'm tired of waiting on you

Every little thing that you say or do
I'm hung up
I'm hung up on you
Waiting for your call
Baby night and day
I'm fed up
I'm tired of waiting on you

Whatever..

These past couple of months have been nothing but grazy. I have not had good night sleep since Nick left. Most nights I sleep 5-6 hours , there are nights I only get to sleep 4 hours. I am afride to fall asleep alone. . I am tired, grumpy and people just irritate me. Yeah, I know- BLAH, blah, blah blah- get some sleep. BU HOW???? I just can not fall asleep alone. I check kids million times during the night. I wake up ever 30 minutes because this freeking 3300 sq/f house is just creeping me out. And our cat has to go before christmas. I can not take it anymore. I sneeze like grazy and cat hair is everywhere. And last night I found my cat in my bathroom licking my retainers. Yuck. On monday I will go and get myself new retainers. NO WAY I stick something into my mouth that is licked by some cat , who licked his @$$ before licking my retainers.

Anyway, I am sleepy but I can not sleep. My mind is busy and restless , I am hungry and it is 11.16 pm.

M a d w o m a n Diana

Overall , awsome day!!!

Yeah!! After multiple phone calls to Trenton NJ, I finally got some questions answered. I mentioned you about Reginas Birth certificate coming in with typos. Well, at first they started blaming me, that I made mistakes on my application. SO I told them, look you ladies, I have it here with me and I am about to fax it to you. YOU tell me then that there are mistakes in my DD application. Suddenly they got really busy, but me on hold and after few minutes on hold, they got back to me and told me, SRRY madam, you were right, person who typed up these certificates made mistake. BUT to fix it, I HAVE to send it in with explanation letter and with my birth certificate copy. DUH!!! I told them I have ordered them before and they DO not need my birth certificate, just give me address, and number of the people who are responsible for this 35 dollar month late mistake. So I got more number, and after few more phonecalls I STILL have to mail in Reginas Birth certificate with explanation letter,but I do not have to include mine. Cool. They wanted me to mail it in with overnight delivery- 47 fucking dollars!!! Hell no!!!!!!!!!!! So I just did monday delivery that costed me 27 dollars. heck, *^*(%(*&(__&*&% I hate spending money on someone elses mistake.!!! ORDER!!! WHERE IS ORDER!????


Anyway, after that hectic morning I helped out in my daughters class, as I do in every friday. Then we got home, ate lunch, picked up Gabe. Dropped my kids off to playmates( after school acitivity/daycare) around 5.30pm. AND then the real fun started. My neighbors invited me to have dinner with them and then we went to see movie. We had dinner at Macaroni Grill. It was ok. I ordered wrong salad. It was way to sweet and way to fatty. YUCK!!! I hate fatty dressings. After few bites of my salad I was full. But then I saw dessert list and I had to get myself tiramisu- YUCK again. It was WRONG, WRONG, WRONG!!! If you ever had tiramisu before , then you know it has to be nice, moist, full of mascapone and coffeee. But this one was waaaay to dry, way to fresh, way to b l a n d!!!!! But I enjoyed dinner with friends. ANother funny thing my neighbors is--- I just found out that they TO got married in Las Vegas. They DO got married on 28th of december, but they got married in 1996, we got married in 1998. I mean, me and S. have the same "dry", weird, mean, kind of sence of humor. We constantly make jokes about each other and laugh out loud. lol We like same kind of things, same kinds of movies, even same kinds of foods. And our views about how to rise kids are same also. I little spooked out. lol And what is even spookier, our sons look like brothers.!!! I SWEAR!! Gabriel and D. look like brothers. ( He son is 7 months younger than Gabe.) :):):)

Oh, the movie we went to see was SAW 2. OH boy, lots and lots of blood. I LOVED IT!!! Saw on was more suspencful, but saw 2 was just bloody mess. lol Good mess!!!!!!! Thumbs up!!!!

I had a preminition......

lol

Month ago I ordered Reginas Certified Birth certificates . I payed total 35 dollars( 5 dollars per copy and rest of it for ovrenight delivery) And finally , month after I placed my order my certificates arrived. I am pissed about that. TO make things worse, they arrived with wrong infrormation. WTF???? They got my name wrong. I do not have middle name. And I doubble checked the form before faxing it to them , to make sure everything is ok.

BEFORE I got her certificates today- I placed another order, bc, I was sure they had messed up something. And afer I faxed new forms over to Vitalrecords, doorbell rang-- ding dong- overnight express at 1.55, one month later.. lol
I need these certificates NOW. I have not time to waste and wait. I have to apply for Reginas passport. I knew something had to go wrong to ruin my such a good lucky week!!!!!!

This is amazing!!!

**I AM DOING MY SILLY HAPPY DANCE** and I have reason to do so. Remember my car accident in Estonia- Deer v. Diana, that costed me 60 000 Estonian Krons??? I got a check in mail today- 4826 dollars!!!! I GOT MY MONEY BACK!!!!!!!!! I GOT MY MONEY BACK!!!! I*GOT*MY*MONEY*BACK*!!!! I never ever even once spoke to my claim handler. Everything was done via email or fax. I am so happy that things are finally looking up.

Now I have to wait until they finally get done with my Teenage Blond V. Diana case, so I can get my Enterprise rental money back ( about 1400). Oh.
I belive in Santa!!

Oh, adventures in Liberty Mutual land...

I am doing little better today. I am still congested but at least no headaches.

Do you know that it is really confusing to pay bills when you are used to paying same amount, but suddenly you get bill with 200 dollars added to that normal amount. lol Anyway, I got our liberty mutual Autoinsurance bill and it was 1742 dollars( yearly). It just sounded little off because I knew it was not supposed to be that high.I signed into account and sure enough, last year we payed 1582.
Anyway, I called them and asked what's up. And the answer was not what I expected. I was hoping that they made a mistake and that is why premium was higher. But no. It is because of my speedig husband. He got a speeding ticket last year in september. I guess he was driving with 80 miles in 65 mile zone. He payd off his speeding ticket , and our premium got raised. yuck.
Year ago I new nothing about how to manage and pay off the bills, and how to balance checkbooks etc. Now I am pro. lol I know exactly where my( our, srry sweety) money goes, and I know what to do if there is an error somewhere. lol I make myself laugh even talk about this b/c it just sound so stupid. lol Oh, and I am getting better talking on phone with people ( customer service specialist, who have no Idea how to help me ) lol

Oh, and my car accident case( US one), is still open and under investigation. What is wrong with those other people. Is it so hard for them to just step up to plate and quit playing games??

**Tuuli and Diana**. People who live in Estnia know who she is;) Anyway, I just want to let you know that I am sick, sick , sick. Not just sick of sitting home and cleaning, but Really sick. Yesterday started with headaches, the at night my throat was swollen and red and today I have chills. My nose is stuffy and burns when I breathe through my nose and food has no taste. yuck. Regina shares my illness with me. Whatever I got, she got it also. Blah. I am drinking hot thera flu( or whatever it is),and doing nothing, because my brain stopped functioning.

Fun fun fun. Yesterday( saturday) I went to North Hollywood to wine tasting party ( again). lol This time we tasted white wines. I do not remember what wine won but it was quite good. Congrats Maarika for bringing winning wine :) Myself I took Santa Margarita, Pinot Grigio(2004). Sale price 22 dollars, but with Vons card I got it with 18. I was looking for 2003 year bottle( my fave), but I was unable to find it. At taste tasting I really did not like that wine very much. It used to be my fave white one( of course 2003 one), but this one tasted way to sour for my taste. So out of 6 wines it shared 4th-5th space. Even dollars store , one dollar wine got better place. lol
This time there was even one wine from Estonia( Poltsamaa Lossi vein), this wine was not for my taste at all. To fruity. NMS.

It was fun night filled with 16 drunk Estonian chicks( In general). I volunteered to make snacks to have with wine. Of course I had to make my famous Walnut goat cheese/gorgonzola terrine. I also salted some salmon, made some smoked salmon with cream cheese filling( rolls), and OF course , what party is without cake. I made pumpkin cheesecake that was big hit !!! I am really happy how everything turned out. ON these days I do not get a chance to practise my culinary arts that much b/c my kids love simple "gourmet' food like plain macaroni and corn dogs. lol And just thinking about making something simple that everyone would enjoy, made me feel good..

oh, I forgot to mention. Kristinas friend( Party was at Kristinas house) made excellent dinner for all of us. Basmati rice with almonds and green peas, rice was wrapped in filo dough and was really crispy and cruntchy from top. That was the best rice I have ever had in my life. HE also made lentil soup, roasted chicken, fish, and some vegetable dish. Everything was just great. OHOHOH, and I have to tell you about THE bread. I have never had so good sourdough bread. He has his own starter that he uses to make home made breads. Oh, carbs!!!

I just have to let it out

SCREAM!!!! Oh F*U*C*K* ( srry). My left sholder hurts so bad the pain is shooting from sholder to my toes. Nothink works anymore. Physical therapy sucks, painkillers suck, sleeping on right side sucks. Everything sucks. Damn sholder. I think I just go ahead and agree with my doctor, that I really, really need cortisone( some weird hormone) injections to my swelling joints. pain is so freekin' bad it sucks to be me.
The worst part is that I can not carry my kids , I can not drive car without holding my tears back, I can not dress or undress without my sholder popping in and out of socket( sp?). Even typing hurts.
All you teenagers out there - listen to your moms- if your mom or dad says this or that will start hurting you when you get older- DO NOT ROLL YOUR EYES. I did..now I wish I payd more attention to all the No-nos.

ps- tomorrow will be fun night. Another wine tasting ahead. I hope to taste my pain away.
d

Lets talk about favorites to lighten the mood...

I think that finally at age 27 I have found my real me. I know what I like, I know what I want and I know how to get it. lol But the sad truth is I am to lazy to pursue my dream. Well, lazy is not the right word to describe but close enough. What I really need right now is good location, about 200 000 dollars and people who will listen to my every word and never argue with me. I am not asking much, right?? lol Really, I really am ready to take my big step, I am ready to go and start something nobody has never done before. But, there is always that B U T!!!. And I do not like buts. So, I rather sit here home and wait until sky starts falling down and I get filty rich just biting my fingernails while watching Jerry Springer.
That is all I have to say. Good nigh.

Here is one pic on me when I was pregnant with Gabe.I am not sure what month, but I tink it is somtimes in march, april or may 2001. We still lived in Newport beach and I ate whatever I wanted and whenever I wanted. And I did have GOOD apetite.lol

I am so not in good shape.

Oh gawd. What is wrong with me again. I did so good dieting since tuesday. But today I just gave in and ate as much sweets as I wanted. Today our neighbors invited us over for little fall party. It was fun. But if you know me well enough, you know that I never go to peoples houses empty handed. While ago I told my neighbor that I LOVE pumpkin cheesecake. She thought that pumpkin pies look and taste gross and pumpkin cheescakes will taste the same. So I baked he MY version of pumpkin cheescake and after I baked it, I cooled it down, took cookie cutters and cut my cheescake into mini pumkins ( about 3 in ones). It is the BESTESTEST cheesecake ever. She LOVED it. Even her brothers wife who also is PUMKIN hater loved it, and even took few pieces with her. And since I baked it of course I had to have it. And I had BIG time. lol Now I feel big, but in a good way. I just hope that I wount turn into sweet round pumkin..... ;)


Now on a different note.... I had the worst real PMS in my whole life. It started right after my estonia trip( in august) and ended now( 2 days ago). I was moody, crampy, hungry, nauseus, horny, happy, sad, depressed- ALLL same time. I even went to doctor twice to make sure I was not pregnant- THANKS GOD , I was not. And then few days ago I finally got my period and I have never been so exited and happy in my life. lol Doctors these days are really fast recomending antidepressants- they do work really well, and I have tryed them in the past, but I this time around I sayed NO, but thanks for offering. I want to be on control. I want to cry when there is reason for tears, I want to laugh when I am happy . I want to be mad , when something gets on my nerves and most of all I want to feel alive and feel like I am real me. Yeah, at times I feel and act like real wacko but that is normal. Everybody is on drugs these days and It is harder for me to get to know real them. What they really feel, how they really act. It is good to hear that it is helping lot of you out there:) I just want to learn to deal with everything my way. I do shred more tears when I talk about my daughters condition, but that is normal. I have right to feel sad and cry when I feel like I can not hold it in anymore. That is me, those are my emotions, and if you think I am to emotional and hormonal, then you are probably to drugged. ( lol, just kidding). Anyway, I am not sure what I am trying to say. I do not want to put anybody down using meds for depression or anxiety. do so if you feel like it and if you can not deal with what you have to deal with. I just eat my cheescake and call it " My drug".

Good nigh. tomorrow is new day, and I start my diet again and hopefully this time I follow it until thanksgiving ( 24th of november)

!!!

Friday update!!!- Beth is home and doing awsome :)

Reginas Best friends mom is having gall bladder surgery today. I hope it goes well!!!!

Best wishes Beth.

Blah

Nothing interesting to report. Yesterday was halloween and we all went out to Trick or Treating . This year Halloween was grazy. TOOOOO many kids ( we got around 500) . It really truly was grazy. From 6pm till 9pm it was nonstop rollacoaster with barbies, batmans and sceletons. Oh how could I forget all the sweet cute princesses and candy hungry ALMOST college kids. What is wrong with you 15 year olds. You all look like anorexia had hit you, and there you go yelling TRICK OR TREAT behind each door hoping to get some candy so you can let your friends know that you got one OZ more than they did. Stupid.

I'm just so sick of all this sugar sitting on my countertop and drawers and purse. I hate people who invented white chocolate covered Reeses peanut butter cups. I used to hate peanut butter taste, but after one bite of those evil treats I was changed person. i want more!!!!! I also hate people who mixed up recipe for Butterfingers. I really, really do. Oh those things are sooo good. They just make you longing for more. I take one tiny bite and before I know it, bag in front of me is empy, and I feel like crap because I just ate whole bag of sweet buttery , peanuty tasting $H!TT!!! Oh crap. I am moody! I really have to get my lazy ass off this chair and hit the gym. I pay membership every single month and I have not been in gym for at least 3 months. :( I just do not feel like going there. I do my cardio and mini weights at home... Ah whatever. I just love complaning , that is so me....
Take care. And if you really want some good candy , call me!!! I may ship some of it to you if you play nice...
Di

Ouch

This is not good. Not good at all. The other day I was just thinking that my back is in such a great condition. No pains , just perfect. And then today while I was vaccuming I turned my head left, heard a crack and after that I was unable to move my neck, back, lift my right arm. From neck , down to my sholderblades, I am pretty much in horrible pain. It is even hard to breath and swollow food. And all this because I want my house to be clean??? Dang, I swear, today was my last time I ever clean up my house again. I get maid service once a week, but I do not like messes,so I pretty much vacuum and dust every day( yeah, my hobby..). I guess If I do not feel better tomorrow I visit my chiro( sadly my insurance does not cover him). But he is the best, so I have to see him. Oh pain, pain go away...
And because of my back pain I will not be able to work out, and I will certanly gain few halloween lbs.

Take care .

DI

Friday. wohoo.

I am home, I am happy, I am full and I am very relaxed. :) Tonight I got to enjoy someone elses culinary creations. I am not telling who it was , but I am just leting to know you that food was amazing. She sent leftovers with me and I have such a huge temptation to open my refrigirator door and eat it. Do not ask me how dish was called. I just know that it tasted yummmmy- eggplant, bell peppers, tomatoes and tomato sauce , meat balls and spices. It was served with crusty rice and tomato/cucumber salad with mint. After main dish we ate hot apple pie with ice cream. :) Fun night.

Now I am wondering if I should do another 40 minutes of cardio( I allrady did 40 min this morning). Halloween is right behind the corner and I can not afford to gain any weight now. When time comes I let you know why ;)

Dang

My friendly ghost ...
Nothing crappy happened today. I swear. It was perfect day full of fun activities . I wish there was something..... b u t if I think about something to bitch about , I should to so about my lazyness. I so want to clean my master bedroom,but I just don't feel like it. I do not know how to explain thins feeling. I have urge to start doing it, but instead of doing it I am doing it in my head- this will go there, and I have to vacuum from here and I have to move my bed, so I could get hang of all the missing socks and underwear that is hiding under my bed.... is it??/ I have to check first before giving you out such an personal information. Oh wait. I just told you that. Oh. I am so confused now.
You see, My mind is just grazy today. Busy, and very creative and happy. I like myself today . I wish that every day was like it. I wish there was more sun instead of rain.
.. Oh, all this chitchat is making me hungry for some chocolate covered cheese. ;)

This is us now...( 2 months ago).lol

December 28th, 1999 we celebrated our first wedding anniversary. This year we'll celebrate our 7th anniversary. It is unbelivable how much we have changed during these years....

Whateva

I feel like crap right now.
Today started out great. I did feel little dizzy and had m little headache, but I just ignored those signs. I blamed it on weather( wet and gray). I went shopping and bought kids some warm winter clothes- it feels weird to say winter out loud in Ca.
I picked up Regina from school and we went to Wahhoos for lunch. At that point my headache was horrible and I felt horrible pressure and burning on my right lover lobe. After lunch we went home and I was pissed because maid has not showed up yet( it was 1/30 pm). They usually show up around 11am. So made showed up 2 pm and started cleaning house. Regina did her homework and I finally got to see how our housecleaning team cleans our house- they suck big time. THEy do not know how to use central vacuming system correctly. They vaccumed in my lightweight area rug and then tryed to pull it out from vaccum. I WAS MAD!!! I told them if something like that ever happens again they will have to pay for repears( about 350 dollars for new one). I ALSO had to show him( yeah, the bathroom cleaner and vaccum person is guy) HOW to properly plug and unplug my vaccum. WTF??

We had to leave and pick up Gabe from school. After he was on board, we headed to mall to spend hour in bookstore. I did buy something very important from there today- HOW TO LEARN TO SPEAK SPANISH FAST!!!1 lol My cleaning team does not speak very good english so I have to do something to make my point more clear...

Around 4.20 we went to Reginas hula school. She danced about 45 minutes and i chatted with my good friend Beth. She is Reginas best friends mom. I love chatting with her. She has great sence of humor and always makes me laugh :)

After Regina finished dancing we all headed to Cocos to have our dinner. Regina had chicken strips( I had to remove breading from chicken). Gabe had mac and cheese and I had corn chowder - oh, it was good. I love soups:):):) At cocos my headache got worse, and when we finally got home every single part of my body was in horrible pain. My left sholder and left knee hurt the most. My head burns and I got fever. I just hope that these side effects for my smoke free like( one of the sideffects are flu like symptoms).

Oh and to add more oil to fire. My dh called and just pissed me off even more. He had stressful day and acted all pissy and I was all sick and started crying right away. He did not say anything bad, he just sayed something that made me feel very small. There you go. I just love days like this.

I just wish my nausea and headaches will go away. They have been my worst enemies since august this year.

Thanks for listening and stay tuned for more whiny Di.

Carb week...

Oh this week has been horrible carb party. Apple pies, pumpkin pies, pizza, cookies, crackers, chocolate cake- what's missing? F I B E R !!!!! I need more fiber NOW. I feel horrible. My digestive system has failed and I am in great tummy pain.... lol What is wrong with me- Yesterday I had to order Pizza from Dominos because Reginas School was making money yesterday( One pizza bought= 1 dollar to Reginas school). They do this kind of fundrasings once a month. Before I ordered pizza I gave myself promise- I WILL NOT EAT CHEESE PIZZA!!! I WILL SAY NO TO PIZZA!!! I WILL LEAVE THE ROOM WHEN MY KIDS EAT THIS DELICIOUS HIGH CHOLESTOROL BOMB! But I broke my promise- the moment I opened the box, something went terribly wrong- I H A D to eat one slice, and other- and kids leftovers.( just tohse crusts). AND it was the most wonderful dinner I have had for a while. lol Anyway, I really need to get my lazy butt to gym and start working out. I also need to restock my refrigirator with salad, herbs, fruits, low sugar juices and whole grain bread. ANd I have to get some baked and smoked tofu. Frozen fruits for my fruit smoothies and tea for evening drink.

BUT it is so hard to diet now. All the stores smell like pumpkin and apple pies and I LOVE That scent. But it also makes me hungry and gives me holiday gravings before holidays are present. Last year I ganed 10 lbs during oct/nov/dec months. I am sure it'll happen this year also. I can not say NO to Holidays goodies. :)

Finally some real fall weather.

I finally hot a chance to wear my sweater today. Weather was nice and cool and was raining on and off all day long.
My morning started 7 am with shower.
8AM brakfast for kids
8.45- Drop Gabe to school
9.10 -Drop Regina to school
9.35 Cost plus
10.10 Burlington goat factory
11.00 Laguna Beach, Aliso viejo beach park( I think)
12.25 Vons
12.50 Pick up Regina from Shool
1PM Eat lunch with Regina
2 PM Reginas Homework
2.45 Pick up Gabriel from School
4PM Hula school for Regina
4.35-5.15 Chat with Beth
5.35-6.40 Hometown buffet
and ..... Now both of my kids are hungry and demanding more food....

I did go to The Beach today. I just had these sudden urge to hear the sounds of the ocean. I wanted to see waves, I wanted to epreience ocean when water is not blue but gray. It was beautiful. Beach was almost empty. There were couple of people running and I think there some art school students painting ocean and that was it. I just watched waves for a while and dreamed about being little mermaid....
And for dinner we went to Hometown Buffet. It was pretty good. Of course I chose to eat all the foods I like, so I really can not comment all the other foods that probably tasted awful. lol.
For dessert I had Hot chocolate fudge cake- OMG. THAT was awsome. I topped it with some cold Ice cream and OMG OMG OMG. I want to go back and get one more spoonful of that chocolate dream.....

:D

Grys Anatomy rocks. I am so into this show. I used to like Desparate Housewifes, but I changed my mind. I'm all about Greys Anatomy and Isaiah Washington(Preston Burke)- He looks like doctor acts like doctor- and if he was real doctor I would like to be his patient.....

Busy busy busy

Today my finger was feeling much better and I decided to pain our guest bedroom. . It was such a hard work. My hands are way to weak. i have no Idea where all the strenght has dissapeared. Weird. To make room more friendly and inviting, I am planning to buy new curtains, bedding, couple of decorative pillows, couple of contemporary but happy paintings and area rug.

On a happier note- I decidied to quit smoking. last night, as I was smoking outside, I suddenly felt really dizzy and sick and started having bad chest pains. I thought I'm having an heart attack. I ran inside and threw up pretty bad.
I had my last cigartet last night around 4 pm and that is it. I have not had one today and I have no urge to light one. Now I just need to keep myself busy and not think about smoking and cigs. I hope I can do it. I can quit this time for good. :) 

Hei Leila. This pic is just for you. ;) Instead of staring my hand , take a look at these beautiful spring flowers from Estonia. :):):)

I'm in great pain

And it is my cats fault. After kids fell asleep tonight, I went to check at them. of course cat was lying on Reginas tumy. You have no Idea how many times I have sprayed that cat with water. NOTHING, he still goes back. So tonight I wanted to slap his butt. I missed first time, I missed second time , BUT I hit the beds wooden footboard with my right middle finger. Suddenly I was in horrible pain and got really dizzy. I was unaible to stand up and walk , So I just lyed down , there on the floor.
Cause of the pain- My "fake" nail hit the footboard, and since I just had new acrylics done, they were still storngly stuck on my real nails, and now I am missing my middle nail-My finger( finger tip) is swollen to a size of potato and I am still in great pain. I applied some triple antibiotic cream and covered it. Oh, and one more thing- Blood was everywhere.
I really truly thought that I am going to pass out. My heart was beating really fast and I was unable to move my head while lying on the floor, and I got really sick( like I was about to throw up). And all this only because my nail got pulled off. ( Turst me, it looks really, really gross right now, and hurts to)
. WHYYYYYYYYY. I just purchased pretty paint, because I wanted to finish one of my decorating projects. But Now It has to wait. For how long- Not sure.


My cat really knows how to cause accidents like that( This one was no 2 because of him)

Lets Drink some wine...

On Saturday night I packed my suitcase( kids suitcase) AND headed to North Hollywood to wine tasting party. It was fun night with great wines and good friends. Since my dh is not home I took Regina and Gabe with me and we spent the night there. This time 12 chicks showed up( 11 estonians and one finnish girl). And we sampled 7 bottles of different kinds of red wines. We had French wine( ( got last place and price for wine was about 28 dollars), 2 dollar bottle from Trader Joes , home made wine from Finland and others were all Ca wines.

This time wines tasted a lot alike. I thought maybe I will find my new favorite wine,but I really did not. Maybe next time. Around 10.30 some of the people left and those who stayed over night put on their PJs and party continued.Leila got really tired and started looking for comfy place to rest. First she tried fireplace- nah, then she sat on a comfy chair and dozed off.
And the winners are.....Merike, Reet,Maarika, Elsi ja Helena. :)

Next time we will taste White wines.

I MISS MY DH.BAAAAAAAAAH. He is gone- again and he will not return before december 1st. Who will watch CSI, Law and Order, Grays Anatomy, Desparate Housewifes, NipTuc,ALIAS with me? I have nobody to yell at, nobody to cook for( well, yeah, I do have 2 kids, but they have excuisite taste- Sarkus Terriaky chicken and Wahoos wishbowls) lol. Who will take out my trash and mess up my house, Who will drink wine and eat cheese with me? Who will tell me that I look beautiful tonight.....

Big Bear #2

Big Bear

Big Bear Lake---






It's ok to have fun sometimes. It is ok to get drunk and feel silly and It is ok to laugh out loud when security dudes think that tea bags that were in my purse might be drugs. lol On thursday my dh suggested that we should do something fun. And since it is Octoberfest time we decided to go to Big bear to have some much needed adult fun. Kids were with us, but we also took babysitter , so we could go out at night and drink lots of beer and eat some german food.

We rented little cute house and spent the night there. During the day we just drove around and checked out some beautiful places. And then spent some time in convention center. Kids really did not like all that drunk crowd. There were lots of bikers with long beards and scary beer bellies. Regina and Gabe told me that they look scary and refused to let go my hand. lol For a moment I felt like I was back in Memphis. Yep, mullets, tatoos, toothless guys and lots of cigaret smoke and of course beeeeeer.

Around 7pm, after we had our dinner, Nick dropped kids and babysitter to cottage, and I stayed there and waited until he returns. But before he left, he purchased huge can( or whatever you call that 1 gallon, 1quart can filled with beer) of beer, and I was sitting outside and waiting him to return. Trust me, lots of people wanted to be my friends then. lol
After he returned we sat down and started drinking. And when I drink , I get hungry. So I got myself funnel cake with hot fudge, and then ate picles, and bratwursts, and sourkraut. And then drank some more. We danced chicken dance, and laughed how funny people look when they are really, really drunk and have no idea how to walk straigh. lol Around 10pm we left because we managed to finish our beer, and I was feeling really yucky. lol.

On sunday we went to Lake Arrowhead. OH, I hated the drive. i was still feeling nausias from all that alcohol, and those curvy roads did not make me feel any better. yuck. And nick was laughing at me all the time because, I asked him to slow down when there was 25 mile speed limit, and he was driving with 35 miles an hour.

Big Bear lake and Lake Arrowhead are beautiful places . Very peacful and relaxing. Eventhough BB is CA, nature there is very different from nature where I live. Lots of mountains, curvy roads, different climate( yeah, it snows there ). I like big Bear.

Lake Arrowhead....

Last night , as I went out for my nightly "smoke" brake, I noticed his fat spider decorating my backyard. The web he was working on was just beautiful. I am scared of spiders, I don't like spiders, but all this just but in in the mood for some Halloween fun. :) Spider is still there today, and his/hers web is up . I think I will hit the stores today or tomorrow , so I could get some Fall stuff to make my house fall friendly. lol. Right Now i am so tired of all the crap that is going around. NO1- I have bladder infection- Not fun, not fun at all. I have to take antibiotics for 10 days and then some meds that turn my pee into halloween orange- so weird. Then I still have problems with Estonian National Car Rental, because they are just being jerks and not sending me the information I need. So I contacted National Us office and they are helping me to get all the paperwork in order , so I can get my money back from Visa. It all sucks. I never , ever , ever ever rent from national again. I want to say thanks to my Friend in Estonia, who has been helping me to straighten things out, but even they get treated really badly . :( IT is just sad. And then Gabriel has weird pumps all over his body. Not chicken pox, We don't know what it is. Doctor took some blood to check for allergies, but we do not know the resaults yet. Just waiting.

OH, I forgot to mention. GKTW does parents night outs on sundays and wednesdays. So I signed up because we thought it would be nice for my husgand and I to have some one on one time together. After we dropped off Regina and Gabe to Magical Castle, we finally got to know where we were assinged to eat. We went to Angels Diner- we also got 25 dollar certificate to eat there and cell phone( well that was like GKTW emergency phone that we had to take from them). Angels dines had to parts- diner part and buffet part. We decided to go to buffet since it had lobsters, crablegs, shrimp, oysters and ribs, and all the other foods I will not mention because we did not eat them. So after 5 lobsters and 3 pieces of cake I was full lol.. Since we chose to eat in Buffet area we had to pay 34 more dollars, since 25 dollar gift certificate simply did not cover it all.....

I make my business- your business....( wish granting, MAW trip vent)

So , where should I start? I guess It really does not matter, becuase I will tell you everything but the truth. ;)

Lets start from beginning. In February 2 volunteers from MKW came to our house to interview Regina about her wish. From start, I just did not like those 2 middle aged successful chicks, who did such a great job granting kids wishes. They just seemed so "fake". One of them was successful realtor and other- I forgot. They "pretended" that they listened, but they really did not.
Then Wish Granting time arrived in sept 12th. They wanted to do this thing as close to Reginas trip as possible( whatever reasons).
Reginas wish as you all know was to meet all the princesses in Florida Disneyworld( she calls it that way). She wanted to have group pic with them on her B Day and eat Princess Birthday cake. Regina told them that herself, without me stepping in.
So those volunteers recommended that Goofys Kitchen In Disneyland Hotel would be great place to let her know that she got her trip. All I had to do is to agree, because I thought they really knew what they were doing.
We were there 5.30pm, and were told not to be late because there was surprise waiting for us. You know what was the surprise??? THEY WERE HALF AN HOUR LATE!!!! *(&^&*(%&*^$ > I was mad. I swear. I was really, really , really mad. I was expecting this fairytale greeting from them and all i got was pissy receptionist who told us that we can not go into restaurant without them.( well Those "girls" told us to go into restaurant.). Receptionist told us if we pay we get in or just wait the other people here in the waiting area. We waited and they finally arrived with SMILES on theyr faces and even did not apologise that they were late. BLAH BLAH BLAH. I "smiled" also and just thought, oh well, maybe there is surprise waiting inside( lol, I really sound desparate). We get in, get our table, and that is it. NO fireworks, no princess related stuff, no surprises. We started eating and chatting and eating and chatting, and they ( those 2 were just talking about theyr vacations- european cruise vacation, btw) and we just sat there and waited until they have finished chatting. Then finally they remembered that OH, We have tickets and all the info you need about your trip. So they handed us tickets and spending money and DORA backback full of dollar store/ Target dollar Isle junk. ( oh, there was one princess coloring book, that must have been that promised surprise). And that was it. Duh, I guess they thought I was some dumb Russian chick---( yeah, they did ask how was life In Russia and about russian president- LIKE I KNOW. They asked this question after I explaned them like third time where i am from and that I DO not speak russian. ) --- and taking us to Restaurant is like fun thing to do. :D:D:D:D

Anyway.... We did get our limo ride to airport 4.30AM ( dang, our neighbors were sleeping and did not see that we got VIP treatment. DANG again.). We did get rental Car( Brand new Chevy SUV- 5 miles on it.) and 4 round trip ticets to Orlando and back, And we did get awsome villa in GKTW. ( Give kids The world) AND Refrigirator full of coke and Ice tea. That made me just laugh, because when Regina was interviewed they asked what were Reginas favorite drinks and snacks- which were at a time, Milk, orange juice, jucy juice, and Pepsi. On same night we went out and got ourselves lots and lots of water, because tap water tasted like pee ( sry).

Now, let me tell you abotu GKTW. All of you who have lived in Ronald Mc Donald house know those famous all you can eat dinneres. lol. Anyway, Gingerbread house( restaurant) kind of served the same kind of food. Lots of that kind of food( pasta, lasagna, burgers, hot dogs, tacos, chicken nuggets etc), you know those foods out of freezer. I do want to thank you all the volunteers who did awsome job serving those foods and cleaning up tables and doing fun chit chatting with people. :):):):) That was great. But you know, we would have really enjoyed hotel better because at least hotels have room service . lol Did loved GKTW only because of merry go rounds and unlimited access to ICE CREAM AND PIZZA ( I ganed 3 lbs because of eating ice cream for breakfast, dinner and midnight snack. )
IT is an amazing place for kids. Fun, friendly and safe. But this place just brought back so many bad memories from past. We saw lots of kids there for whoom this trip was the last one. And I felt so bad and depressed after I spoke to some parents. :(:(:( But that is the reality and GKTW helps make some dreams come true. :)

OH and biggest uuuuuuuups arrived on 18th of September. I went to pick up Reginas B Cake from front desk.( they provide cakes for B Girls/boys- cakes from Wal Mart) . When I got the cake I almost fell flat on floor. WHY, you ask. But because my dear people of world IT LOOKED plain and fallish with fall leaf sprinkles and some icing hills. I was about to start crying because I really, really was expecting Princess cake. I swear, my expectations were much higher. :( I thought for sure that Regina hates the cake and she remembers that she wanted to have princess cake. So in the morning we sang her happy B day and served her cake. She did look at it for a long while and then decided to taste it. And she liked it. :):):):) BUT IT WAS NOT WHAT HER WISH WAS!!!!!!!! DUH. What is wrong with me? .... She was happy and enjoyed her trip, but all I do is whine and complain. :(

After day was over 19th) I asked where she wanted to eat her B day Dinner. She chose Chilis- her favorite restaurant in whole wide world. ;) She ate pizza and french fries and then we ordered chocolate molten cake - OH THAT WAS THE BEST THING THAT HAPPENED IN ORLANDO. lol It was amazing. And we got her Sleeping Beauty dress from gift store ( 90 frekkkking dollllaros), but since we had spending money, we really did not care. lol

on 20th we went to Sea World and it was sea world with extra sea falling from the sky. We went to see dolfin and killer whale show- amazing show, we got front row seats - or course. and everywhere we went we got treated with highest respect. :) Seaworld was awsome :) They love GKTW children and do anything to make theyr stay comfy and fun :)

And on 21st we flew back home and landed after Jet Blue had to do emergency landing. And then Limo picked us up and around 8PM we were back home , and again our neighbors did not see our beautiful while extra long Lincoln limo. lol
- anyway- Universal( 2 parks)- Thumbs up
-Disney Magic Kingdom- thumbs halfway up- because princesses ran away from us and didnot want to greet us. :(- but we really did enjoy all the rides we took on that day - about 8 rides- And no waiting on lines and no late fees. ;lol
-MGM- really cool
-And Sea World- thumbs up

Don't be alarmed. I'll be back with whiny and pissy updates. I just enjoyed my daughters vacation and accumulated lots of PMS 24/7 material. Trust me, worst is yet to come.....

credit card fraud

I got my credit card bill today. Nothing unusual about that, we get it monthly. ;lol But what was unusually weird was one statement- Natural beauty, Memphis Tn, - 104.28. It was chardged on 28th of August( I was nowhere near to memphis). When my dh called credit company , he was told that it was phoned in order. Not from me, I have no Idea what is natural beauty, and I have no Idea what it sells. So after little chit chat with Chase- they will remove that 104.28 from our card, cancer our old card and issue us new cards. Freeky, huh? SO all of you out there check your monthly bills carefully- we have auto payments set up, but after this we cancelled auto pay. i think if my bill was more that 400 dollars I would not have noticed it, but since I knew that I have not shopped much during that past month something just smelled stinky.

So people, fess up? Who used my creditcard number to purchase some "NAtural beauty???

First...

First , I would like to thank my awsome doctor. He is miracle worker.
On friday morning I woke up with horrible body aces, sore throat, bangin headace and racing heart. I was unable to move- pain was bad. But sine I have 2 kids who need me, and one of them had to go to school, I just took my last energy that was left and went downstairs to get ready. After we dropped Gabe to school, I took Regina with me to my docs office. Regina was on meds and she slept most of the time. She even did not wake up when doctor was checking me out.

Combination of meds he gave me took my pain away 3 hours after I took my first pill( antibiotic), my congested head was not congested anymore and my sore throat was history on Saturday morning. I still have to take meds for 10 more days, but wow, all I can say is wow. Never ever meds worked so well.

Regina is also feeling much better and is ready for her Make A Wish trip on 16th of september. :) Wohooo.

SECOND---- My dh is returing home from china. yeah to that. He did mention that he has bad cold, but I'm not worried much about it.

I like myself in mornings, because my tummy is nice and flat. Around 5 pm my tuumy starts growing and 9 AM looks like I am about to give birth.... I have to do some serious abwork..

back home...

If you have not read Reginas St jude adventures yet, then please go there and you get the Idea what is going on . :)
http://www.diana78.blogspot.com

OH, I'm so tired but I can not fall asleep. I'm stuffed with food but I'm still hungry. I have been stuffin myself since monday- ribs, chicken, pork, coke, pork rinds, diet coke, diet pepsi, fanta, more pork, bread, candy, hamburger buns with bbq sauce etc. Hunger is horrible feeling. It gives me nightmares. I dream about pigs roasting on a open fire and some dude from germany is making sure meat is ready. Then I had a dream about me moving to mars, because there is more space for me and I don't have to pay money to shop. What was that dream all about??? And then I had dream about me getting sick and when I woke up this past morning I was sick- I think Regina " borrowed" her germs , so I could get a clue how bad she really is feeling. And When I am sick I am usually hungry, and when I am sick, I can not taste food. Food has no taste whatsoever and then I keep eating and eating, hoping to taste something finally. And then I finally get it- DUH, I can not taste the food, why do I keep eating things if nothing tastes at all. I'm confusing myself again.

Today I really, really had to go to restroom, but phone rang and Instead heading to restroom I picked up the phone and started talking. After 5 minutes of chitchat I decided to quit the conversation because I had to pick up Gabe from school. BUT there I was standing , in the middle of my family room, thinking, what did I forget to do? I thought and thought and thought and I forgot. I carried Regina to car, sat on my comfy drivers seat and started driving- AND THEN IT HIT ME!!!!!! I NEED TO PEEEEEEEE.... How could I forget such and important thing????

Oh- I forgot to add. I had hot Thera Flu( powder+hot water= buzzzzzzz) I feel like I'm drunk AND hungry now.

PMS is kicking in...

yeah, tell me about it. TOmorrow early morning 5 am , taxi will pick us up and take us to OC airport. Our flight is around 7 am. Then we have to change planes and we only have 30 minutes to do so. I am so mad at St Jude travel office this time. ARE THEY GRAZY??? THEy give me and regina only 30 minutes to run from one end of airport to other. And airtraffic these days is horrible always late, always delayed. WTF. If we miss our flight tomorrow then it is not our fault. We'll be in St Jude around 2pm. ANd then we have nothing to do until 7.45 am on 6th of Sept.

I feel like I am flying to Vegas. It is all about cambling . You insert the coin and you eather win or loose. In Vegas I usually loose.....But that is ok. It is just a money...

But we are talking about My daughter here- we have to get the best news possible WE HAVE TO...., we hope to win . Good news for me is winning. And clean scans, no more damage to her hearing, good P/T check up apointment- those good news will make my next 3 months the happiest ever. :)

Talk to you later.

Here is a pic of my 19 year old brother Tiim, who lives in Southern Estonia and who just graduated from high school. Now he is waiting invitation letter from army, so he could join the army.

>>>

Oh so mad.

Today was one of those days I felt really creative. Like really, really , really creative. I played quitar, I wrote couple of silly love songs AND I worked 3 hours working on my photoshop project. After i was finally happy with outcome I decided to save my breautiful ( the best graphic project yet) layout containing layers, specieal effects, words, sunshine, fire - everything that I had worked out in my head, and I finally got time to create it. And then BOOOOOM. My computer crashed. IT CRASHED while I was saving my project. Oh, I was mad, I was so mad I made myself hot chocolate with whipped cream and I drank 3 glasses. That how mad I was.!!!!!! I would create this project probably now withing 30 minutes, but I am just so freekin' mad that it happened. Now I just drink my wild strawberry coctail and curse out loud. ( PSS kids are in bed).

Until next time...

Just a thought.

This is one of those weird random thoughts that just came to me while I was Medicine shopping.
I passed the isle where pregnancy tests are on. I just stepped and checked what is new. Then I remembered when I was pregnant with Regina I took a test that had + and- on. - Not pregnant and+ Pregnant. Well, these days you can have plusse s, and minuses, and stripes and circles and NOT PREGNANT, PREGNANT etc. WOuld it be funny if one day you take a pregnancy test and suddenly ROBOTIC voice sayes-YOU ARE PREGNANT, or YOU ARE NOT PREGNANT, TRY AGAIN. LOL. I'd just take pregnancy tests to hear that voice. lol Or then there would be pregnancy tests that also tetermine DNA( if dad is who you think it should be). Now , that is a thought...........

I swear..

... I am not a bad person. Just evil- sometimes. heh. Anyway, what I want to say is that sometimes, when we went out to party and I really did not feel like chatting or dancing with some so called "dude", I pretended that I did not speak Estonian. Well, I know what I did was really wrong, but it saved me many many times from " trouble". ( In Southern Estonia( almost country side), lot of people still don't speak english , and it is easy to spot those people. I meant nothing bad by not dancing with them, but if you saw the awsome moves they had on dance floor, you all wish you never saw those moves. I SWEAR THEY WERE THAT BAD!!! I still carry couple of mental pics with me...... I need therapy- fast.

Couple of times when I went out with my sister, people often asked who am I , am i her friend. People who knew us of course they knew that we are sisters. BUT drunk people, who did not know us, did not know that we are sisters, I told them a little lie. I AM SIJAS MOTHER!!! lol Belive me, it was hilarious to see those drunk reactions. Some of them went back to bar to buy new drink , because they thought they are allready hallusinating, and maybe one more drink will help them calm down, then couple of guys sayed that IT IS possible to drink people young and beautiful ( not sure how to take that comment- lol). But yeah, I had fun, and hopefully have fun next time when I go back and time after that.....

My grandmas sister - she was recently diagnosed with breast cancer. She decided not to get treatments for her deadly disease. We wish her all the best and lots of strenght to fight for her life. :)

Friend Ylle and I- couple of "locals"

We found a lonely wooden dude playing his instrument. Sija offered some of her ice cream to him, but he gave us silent treatment- HOW RUDE!!!

So ,who is getting ready to party???