:)

Today was such a busy day. First helped out Gabes teacher. And then real fun started. My good and very talented friend Parisa asked me to take some pictures of her. ( she needs them because of her work). 2 hours of picture taking paradise.

I really did enjoy photographing her, since camera loves her. :) And I know that she does not mind that I share some of the pics with you :)

Here is her website.

http://www.parisa-defaie.com/

And now I am just relaxing and hoping that my kids do not get reall sick by tomorrow. Both of them had low grade fevers today. :(

I almost forgot , yesterday I went to my neighbros house to halloween party. She is did awsoem job decorating her house. And her food was all halloween themed. She is horrible cook ( yes, she tells this to everyone, ) but she is awsome baker and decorator. :)

(APple cranberry punch)

Brain Jello--

Do not feed BIRDS.....

I know I am smart. I am just fuckin’ lazy. Yeah. You got it girl. And I want to do 0 about me learning mucho to get perfecto.. ( I have no Idea if there are even such words). Haha.

Like most of you know I am taking psych classes. Very me. I LOVE psychology. I have finished reading my WHOLE book ( 15 chapters) . We are on chapter 7 now and it is about learning, IQ, intelligence etc. SO I took IQ test today. Good IQ test. I scored high and I was surprised to see that I scored that high. I was sure that I scored below 100, but seems like my brain is not dead at all. It is getting smarter, in fact.. My IQ score was 120. Not bad. I am not genius but it is above average ( max to my age is 166) and I am very very exited about it. I knew that MATH is my weak point and I scored VERY low on math, but I scored very high on pattern recognition and general knowledge ( about 85% in both. Now I know that Regina gets puzzle and problem solving from me and MATH abilities from Nick. Gabriel is totally something else. I still have not figured “HIM” out. Because he is like me. HE likes EVERYTHING, he is good at EVERYTHING. He can sing, he can dance, he is good at solving problems, he learns everything very fast, he makes friends fast- Almost like me …lol. He is a male version of me… ;)


Back to me now…. I feel the need to stop eating. I decided , that starting from tomorrow, I will only buy healthy food in my house- Well, Most of my food is healthy, BUT my kids eat crap during school snack times. SO there will be no foods with additives, no SMG, NO GMO, no Red food colorings, no shit….. yup, Diana is going Organic and natural. And so does my grocery bill.. Henrys, trader joes, wild oats, farmers market… etc. These are the best stores in whole wide world, BUT they are located little further away from us. I hate driving . I like things to be around me … but to healthier Diana I am ready to drive.
I hope to stop HOT FLASHES with better nutrition…..

OK. I have to do my cardio now. I ate 2 cups of taro ice cream tonight and I can FEEL IT crawling to my thighs- and forming those orange peal like “ mountains”.

Bored, so bored....

I am officially bored with my life. My house is clean, My kids are well behaved, I am great cook, awesome catch ( wink, wink). Yeah, here I am totally , completely full of myself because I am just so bored. Today I went to see Movie Departed- Leo, Matt, Jack – you know, the good stuff… I have to tell you , I never, ever liked Leonardo . He was not my type of actor OR I did not like even how he looked. BUT this movie just made me fall in love with him. Seriously- He looked hot - real hot, baby. And I almost cried when his head got blown off. HIS poor beautiful head, those amazing eyes. To bad he is such an ass in real life. Imagine this- he only dates supermodels and I know why. His poor self esteem is so low and he has no friends. Boohoo. So he needs a 6 feet tall self esteem booster…

AND this brings me to my latest nightmare . About 4 nights ago ( on 17th of oct) I had a bad dream . I was in my bank filling in some forms. Suddenly one guy, dressed very nicely walked towards me- I smiled. He asked- What the fuck I am smiling about because there is nothing to smile about – I am going to blow your head off first. All I could think about was- Please no, my kids are still young- And then BOOM, my brains flew out of my head and …. I had to wake up because my alarm clock sounded. Dang, I wanted to know what happened next. I tried to have same dream next night- But it did not happen- instead I dreamed about how overweight I had become, because I did not fit in from my front door. I guess it is my biggest fear….

OK. Back to my Officially boring life. I need something exiting. I need to get out of my house more often without kids. I mean evenings, nights. I miss dancing. I miss clubbing. I miss the feeling I get in club , when beat is so loud I can hear my heart beating in the rhythm of trance. I miss how it made me feel when I let my guard down and just danced, danced, and danced. I MISS having a drink with my friends and just goofing around. And I miss my husband to- just a little….

>>>M<<<

I am not sure what world has become. Since when we started caring what other people would do , or what color underwear they wear. ? Since when Brad and Angelina become our super hero’s and since when we would tell our kids – SHUT up, I want to know did Jen really brake up with Vince.
I am just so sick and tired of all this commotion around 21st century “superheroes”. I turn on TV, and hear- Braking news just in- Katie give birth to a healthy baby girl. I switch channel, - NO, No, No- Katie give birth to a healthy BOY. Oh. Now I am confused- I switch one more time—Oh, no- Katie did not give birth yet. Few more weeks to go. WTF??? I can’t take it anymore. I want to turn on TV and watch something together with kids- show like teaching kids to dance, or how to teach them to sing- or how to boost self esteem. Yeah, it is nothing racy, but what are we teaching our kids by telling them- you know- Maddox has Mohawk- it is really in now, We should go to hairdresser because you are going to be coolest kid ever ….
Or I hear kids talking before they go to their classes- You know what my mom told me, I am really cute and when I grow up I am going to be the most popular girl .- AhAAA. Yeah, it is going to be me. MHM…
Other girls join in- me to, me to , my mom told me that I am pretty to and I am going to be most beautiful girl in the whole wide world.

Then I hear boys talk- but you know what I want to be when I grow up- girls ask WHAT- I am going to by a big gun and do some shooting. Because it is so much fun ….. ( WTF????) and then they imitate shooting ( at age 6-7). And girls stick their fingers in their mouths, then zzzzzzzzzz on their butt and - UH, I’m so hot…. ZZZZZZZZz , peace bros and sistaaaas…..

I just listen to these conversations and wonder- I must be doing something right because my kids want to be train driver, trash truck drivers and doctors and bakers. ( sound reasonable …) OR, should I start pushing them to be more “ hip “ these days like--- Pamela Anderson Look a likes…??? Or should I take them to get their pedicures and manicures every week because when you do not get your nails done you are sooooooo yesterday…. ( yeah, you are--- let me remind you- last time I had my nails done was 2 years ago…) …

Talk to you later bitches and HOs.

My fave quote- It is a discusting little gross fairytale Poor girl meets a rich guy and they fall in love. And they live happily ever after. I am so bored of that story.. ( Erica from Bachelor )

:)

:) I have been doing much better these past few days. My energy levels are still pretty low, but emotionally I am in better place. I have been very busy with things around here. Monday, tuesday and wednesday I spent lot of time in my kids school taking pictures of kids. ( for yearbook). Kids are so cute. They all know me by name and run to me and give hugs . Funny is, that they tell their parents about that some mom took pics of them and moms were all curious WTF??? lol Funny.

I also have been decorating for halloween. lots of cute little decorations. I love halloween. I love colors, emotions, candy, kids, decorations. EVERYTHING> :):):) I love smells of halloween, I love costumes. I just love it. :)

I also got a outfit to my HP. Beautiful new Daisy skin. I love daisys , these flwoers remind me estonia and midsummers day. :)

We also went to one more pumpkin farms with our friends. They give me such an hard time. they make fun of me for taking belly dancing classes. They think I do not get their jokes, but trust me, i do . I just do not reply to them because If I do, ( Knowig Him) h would make even worse jokes. So FY.

Oh, Today I baked some cinnamon rolls. Oh, THye came out sooooo goood. My house is smelling delicious. It is 9.36 PM and I am eating bread. End of the world is here. But this is only time of the day when i am hungry. I could go all day long without eating and then around 10 pm I get little hungry.

OH. I saw my cardiologist. I had complete blood test and everything came out fine. So it must be in my head. I just think myself sick. I got to change my thinking. I have to be more positive. :) I hate being positive. To much hahahah and ohohohoh just makes me go . DAMN what the heck is wrong with me.....


AND... have you estonian chickis have noticed coffe names in starbucks... Sulawesi, and Estima... What's next- Talina////????

Aaaah

I do not know what is going on with me. My energy levels are acting up. One moment I feel happy and energized and then suddenly I am tired and down. I eat my lunch, but around 2 hours after lunch , horrible hunger hits me. I start sweating, get irritable and moody and at times even nauseous (sp?) and dizzy. I HAVE TO have a bite of something, if not I may pass out because I just loose all my strenght and energy. it is very weird feeling. And second time around I get same kind of feeling after I eat my dinner. . My mood can change with a snap. AND I can't stop yawning. Oh, and my vision is weird also. Sometimes when I wake up in the morning I have hard time opening my eyes and when I do everything seems blurry... but that goes away after few minutes. i guess I am just starting to get stressed again and there is just way to much pressure and responsibilites in my sholders. I really, really do need a brake. I need a brake to think , and find myself again. I feel like I am starting to separate myself from everybody and everything. I have not done my fave things for a while- I used to see EVERY new movie out there- now I just netflix them. I used to be exited about scrapbooking and taking pics - now my camera just collects dust because I lost my interest. BUT I clean, and clean and clean and clean and I am about to go grazy if I pick up mop one more time and wash my floors. I am going nuts. I am going to bee around 1 am and wake up 6 am every morning. ( I just can't fall asleep- I am tired, but I can't sleep. I toss and turn and toss and turn and have nightmares (sp?). And few of my friends are just driving me grazy by complaning about things that just are not even worth mentioning. And when I want to vent away ... ah, I am not even going there. .... Anyway, .I havent felt so lonely in years.........

:(

All I got to say is- Blogger beta sucks. I hate it so much , I am about to STOP bloggin forever. I can't upload pics, I cant post, I can't log in? What next? UGH. I posted loooooong post before. Hit post and nothing. Everything just dissapeared like someone had flushed it down with water. Suckers.


Anyway- I took kids to pumpkin patch today. ( yes, I had 101 fever, but it is not my job to be sick. I still have to take care of kids and entertain them. then I get a call from Nick telling me I AM S I C K tooo. Honestly? Are you sure sweety? If you are, you are not getting any symphaty from me. I know your job is important- MAKING MONEY. blah, blah blha, so we can afford this beautiful house, but MY job is more important. So stop whining and do not tell me that your life is hard. I am the one who takes care of kids, I AM the one who cleans the house, I AM the one who cooks, I am the one who pays the bills ( wo what that you make the money), I am the one who takes care of kids so what that I have fever. So pleas tell me , whose life is fucking hard?? HUH.??? OHOHOH I forgot to mention- I am the one who has to attend all the IEP meetings and I AM THE FUCKING ONE WHO HAS NO LIFE BECAUSE I SIMPLY AM SO TIRED IN THE END OF THE DAY that I lost interest doing thing I LOVE to do. SO SHut up. ( sorry ). But I just had to let it out. I need to do it more often ( UPs, I forgot one thing- I AM THE one who also has to study when kids are in school, so I CAN DO SOMETING BETTER WITH MY LIFE THAN JUST CLEANING AND COOKING.

Anway- pumpkin patch was lots of fun. I have not seen my kids so energized for ages. They were runnin around, playing games, and taking rides up on a storm. And total amount spent in pumpkin patch -80 dollars( 40 dollars for rides and rest of it for games and food) SUCKERS. All they want is money from us. They know that they can't sell that many pumpkins so they came up with alternitive route. Seems like it is working.
Oh, we had lunch in hometown buffet. I love food, even though my taste and smell have gone to vacation- I managed to remember how chocolate, ice cream, peach gobbler, chocolate mousse cake tastes and I ate and I ate and I ate. Now I feel sick to my stomach. But who cares. It was food. We never stop complaning about food.

Fall

Did I TELL you that I love fall??? I do.
Today , I did 1 hour and 15 minutes of volntering in Gabriels class. After class I had to walk to my car, but what I noticed was something really beautiful. IT is amazing how colorful fall is this year. Red, yellow, brownish tones are decorating trees ever

ywhere. Air feels nice and crisp, and I can SMELL the freshness in air. I Oh. It felt so nice. I started missing Estonian muddy, dark, and rainy fall.

I used to hate that "part" , but now I miss it.

Feeling crafty.

Today I went to Tall Mouse ( craft store) and bought about 20 wooden pieces ( dollar each) - pumpkins, cats, snow mans, santas, people. etc. And I started decorating them. I am on roll right now. AND I LOVE FALL. AIR outside is so nice and crisp. :)

....

Go Ask Alice is wonderful website for all of you who have guestions about drugs, alcohol, fitness, nutrition and everything else that could make you perform better in this world. Check it out and I am sure many of your questions will be answered. :)

http://goaskalice.com/

Today was lazy day. I took kids to best buy and toysrus. There was huuuuge sale going on. Lot of the things buy one , get other 50% off, clearance sales on gamecube games, and much more. Gabriel threw horrible tantrum in store. I WANT NEW GAMES kind of tantrum. I told him- Too bad, he just made it to naughty list.

After shopping we went to IHOP. I have not been to IHOP for ages. NOW I know where all smokers in OC go. IHOP. lol

Gabiel had LOTS OF FOOD. He ate his kids meal ( 2 fryed eggs, bacon ) and then he wanted my ham and cheese omlette ( he ate half of it) THEN he wanted to eat my pancakes( something Harvest ones. do not remember what it was.) And he did eat 1 .

I had to laugh out loud in there. Listen to this. Gabriel wanted tabasco sauce on his eggs. and bacon. 3 drops were not enough. HE WANTED me to pour half of it out, so he could stick his bacon into HOT SALSA. - of course I had to please my son. HE was really happy that I did it. THEN he wanted me to pour some strawberry syrup over his eggs. ( I had to do it )> He ate his eggs with strawberry syrup. THEN the mixed strawberry syrup and tabasco sauce- AND I WAS ABOUT TO THROW UP , when he decided- MOM. I NEED some regular syrup inside this mix. BECAUSE it does not taste right. So i gave him his syrup and - he told me----- MOM , THIS WAS BEST LUNCH I EVER HAD. lololollololol

Regina was just looking at him and rolling her eyes and telling me - GAbriel is so discusting. lololol

NICE. And then I did some cleaning. Dusting and ant killing and dishwashing since my diswasher is kaput.